The only proper way to usher summer in, as any self-respecting pagan will tell you, is to get semi-naked, cover yourself in paint and play with drums and fire. That’s pretty much the sum of the Beltane, an ancient Celtic festival, as it’s celebrated on Edinburgh’s Carlton Hill in the town centre.

Beltane’s been celebrated there since the late 1980s, but in recent years events the shindig on the last day of April have increasingly moved from party – just a lot of new agey types getting a skin-full on a hill – to performance with hundreds of active participants and thousands of camera toting passive ones – and a £5 entry fee. So it’s now amid the American twang, guttural German and noisy Spanish that you watch the spectacle unfurl.

You’ll need a proper pagan to tell you relevance of the whole affair, all a fairly ignorant observer like me can tell you that it’s to the belting rhythm of drums and by the light of flaming torches that a May Queen parades around the hill, visiting groups of half-naked ladies and gents smeared in green, or blue or red. The former seem to represent some kind of elemental thing, perhaps wind and water, but it’s the devilish red-painted-folks that real spectacle. Not only do are most of the ladies topless, but they are also tossing and spinning fire, which looks wicked against the backdrop of Edinburgh night cityscape. After much melodrama – dancing and reeling, worshiping the fire, pelvic thrusts and screeching – things head to a climax on a little stage. I had to do a fair bit of jostling through Edinburgh’s vast Polish community to get a really good view of the little stage where more pseudo-evil tomfoolery took place, courtesy of the loin-clothed reds and eventually a series of experimental human pyramids by the light of the gigantic bonfire that’s been lit. The final stretch of the parade around the hill involves the May queen processing to a tent. From there it’s hard to see what goes on, but some amorous goings on under canvas are defo part of it. The city council has banned the festival from going on past 1am, so things are wrapped up fairly abruptly, though die-hards continue elsewhere – and end things with a roll around in the morning dew on Arthur’s Seat. So pack a toothbrush....

For a proper lowdown of the fest see www.beltane.org.